Words from a Recovering Perfectionist

One of the most toxic proverbs which blight attempts to become better at something (whistling, skimming stones, speaking French, ironing shirts, writing films) is “If a thing is worth doing, it's worth doing well”.

Not because it is intrinsically wrong, but because it casts an unspoken shadow over an endeavour every time it is conjured. “If a thing isn't done well it is worthless [and so are you].”
I come from a perfectionist background, where if you don't excel within the first few attempts at something, the attempt to learn is abandoned for fear that you will come second, or look ridiculous. The idea of doing something badly because you are learning how to do it well – or even, just for fun – is unknown.

I (re)started writing 7 years ago, during a long summer of semi-employment. I walked into my first screenwriting class in the second week of September that year. And I scored some easy hits – so far, so good. In keeping with tradition I expected instant results, which of course, did not come. I had to learn a great deal first, not least of which was patience with my own ability to write crap.

This patience was a revelation to me – the fact that I continues to enjoy turning up every morning to the keyboard even when the results were shitty, and adulation and/or cash slow in coming, because I was still learning, was liberating.

After the initial excitement from my old partners in perfectionist crime I started to pick up on real disapproval from some of the fellow perfectionists “Oh for Chrissakes – it's been three years! Just how long does it take to write a screenplay then!”, and “Yes, that's all very well, but how do you intend to make money from all of this”.

This comes from individuals who I see crippled by their own perfectionism. They don't do things at which they do not excel, at which they will come second or third, or which might make people laugh. They don't speak foreign languages aloud, they don't play the piano, they don't ride bikes – and I don't do those things either... [yet!]

The point is – you will never come first, if you don't come second or third or 10th while you are learning, and you will never have the patience to come 10th, third, second or first if you don't enjoy the process of learning, and laugh with your own failures.

So my motto now is “If a thing's worth doing, it's worth doing.”